72 hours & a bit of a breakdown.
November 24th, 2009 at 1:14 pm. Posted in Just Rachel.So, I’ve been engaged for… less than 72 hours. It’s still pretty surreal. I keep playing him asking me over and over again in my head and I get all sorts of giddy just thinking about it. Really. People have been asking us left and right if we’ve picked a date yet. (Seriously, does that drive anyone else NUTS?) I haven’t put much thought into it recently, but Matt and I have talked about it a lot the last few months.
We know we (when I say “we”, I really mean “I” because Matt is perfectly happy as long as i’m happy) want to get married when it’s warm out, late May to early September at the latest.
We know we want it to be on the beach because well, if you know me at all… you know you can find me on the beach from April til September. It’s my home, it’s OUR home… it’s just important to me to have it on the beach.
We want it to be as informal as humanly possible. I look at our wedding as kind of a “formality”, I guess. Matt and I already have an amazing life together. This is just a celebration of that life we are already living in front of God, our family and friends.
I don’t think I want a traditional reception. I’m wildly uncomfortable being the center of attention. The whole garter toss and all of that mess does NOT appeal to me. I want something very Young House Love esque. I just want a big party celebrating the love we already share. I want to etsy the crap out of it. I want to handmake so much of it.
So last night, i’m laying on the couch with Matt and we’re talking about all of this and started talking about dates and time frames and all that. We have unanimously decided that it absolutely CAN NOT be held in 2011. Matt’s kid brother is getting married that summer and two wedding so close together isn’t fair to family or to his brother. We don’t want to steal his thunder. So that leaves us with September 2010 or whenever we decide to do it in 2012. Why September 2010? Well, Matt is in Iraq ’til June-ish and I don’t want to do it RIGHT when he gets home, so I figured it would still be GORGEOUS the first two weeks in September, so that would be perfect.
So while we’re laying on the couch discussing this and our possibilities and I started to get super upset. September was SO CLOSE and the thought of planning this whole wedding (or almost all of it) while he was in Iraq and going over details via skype makes me all sorts of barfy. 2012 just seems SO FAR AWAY. That’s like… 2 1/2 years. Not acceptable (Matt thinks of it as more time to save money, more time to plan, maybe a destination wedding! ooooh!). And then I remembered that he is leaving in TWO WEEKS. I got sort of overwhelmed and started bawling my eyes out in his lap for no reason. I mean, we were talking about our WEDDING! THATS HAPPY!! And here I am, hysterical. I’m not a complete headcase or anything. Really. Just the prospect of planning a wedding with my Fiance in Iraq? That is a little much. But then, so is waiting until 2012.
I ended up going to bed around 9:30. I didn’t want to be a total damper and honestly, I promised myself I wouldn’t let him see me cry before he deployed… I don’t want to make this any harder on him than it already is. So, I just went to bed. Which, is sort of pointless… because he followed me in there. We talked for a bit and he just kept reassuring me that everything was going to be okay. Which is true. It will be. Deep breaths.
So yeah. That’s how the first 72ish hours have been. The more I think about it, the more likely it is that we will end up doing this in September, but we’ll see. Everything good is worth waiting for.
omg, rachel! big, big, big hugs. 6 months is definitely long BUT you guys have such a beautiful future that awaits you both when he returns. you’ll get to plan the wedding & do things with your friends…workout? (that’s what i do). anyways, post as many blogs as you need/want. i’m here to listen/read and be your little cheerleader. woohoo! xo, L